Monday, October 17, 2011
CONFESSIONS OF A MUSIC JUNKIE
Sooo...a few times a week, I look for new music. Sometimes it's just of my favorite artists and sometimes it's just in general to see what's out there. While I was on a 5 hr train ride, I started lookin' up music by R Kelly, hoping to find some new stuff by him...thank the sweet baby Jesus that the King of R&B seems to still be doin' his thing! Now I'm just gon post a few youtube video links so you can listen to them. Some of these songs belong on a potential TP-4 album! And then some of his songs are just good period - great instrumental, words, etc. I wonder if I should start posting a lot of the new music that I find, but anywho hope you enjoy some of these songs that I found cuz I know I sure do! P.S. some of these songs aren't complete, but they're still a nice start and whatnot. I JUST READ THAT R KELLY IS WORKING ON ALBUM CALLED BLACK PANTIES...WHICH IS SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE 12 PLAY!! Take yo birth control ladies cuz it sounds like a baby makin album!
Thursday, October 6, 2011
Blast From The Past: Friendship + Sex
First of all before I start this topic, I absolutely must get something very important off of my chest...me and Ludacris are meant to be together. Lol now I needed to say that because it's just way too many coincidences that me and him have that support my case. For instance, there was one time in DC he had a Conjure Cognac party and I really wanted to go but didn't have the money. So I tried to get in the club before 10:00 p.m. so I could get in free, but we got to the front of the line at like 10:03 and the man tried to charge me $40. Thank goodness to my features, club dress, and manipulative ways, I got in that bitch for $10 lol. But anywho, when he finally got on stage at the club, guess who he gave some Conjure Cognac to? Yeah you already know...ME! And he gave me 3 cups lol see that's love. Also, I rapped on the mic his lyrics to P-Poppin lol that man loves me. Then he has RTed me TWICE...not once...twice! That's because he loves me. And the first time he tweeted me was when I told him he must have found out he's a married man because of the rumor at the time. And he tweeted me to clarify and reassure me that I am still the one for him lmao. And I have both of his products, Conjure Cognac and Soul by Ludacris headphones (which are GREAT by the way! Go cop 'em!) accounts following me on Twitter. AND my tweet is featured on his Soul by Ludacris website lol he wants me included in all areas of his life. See all my evidence?? lol you can't say I'm crazy now...all that is just way too coincidental for it to simply be a coincidence, it's fate...it's our destiny. lol I know I sound crazy, but anywho into the actual topic of today's post.
Had a very interesting conversation with one of my close friends a couple of days ago. Basically one of his friends (which is a mutual friend) has proposed to him that they become fuck buddies. Now, I addressed this topic in an earlier post, but this conversation enlightened me on some things (and well I was actually out of this world when I was talking to him so I was thinking thoughts I probably normally wouldn't have thought about). The first thing I thought (since I know the both of them) was why was my friend asked this question. If a friend ever asks you to be sex buddies, listen. Out of all their friends in the world, they decided to ask you. Now, because this rose as a concern to me, I immediately thought about how complicated sex can make this friendship. Now I know that one of them can have sex without being emotionally attached, but the other person, not so much. I think feelings would develop from one person and the other not feel the same way, hence causing major tension in the friendship. And at this point, their friendship has grown a lot closer. Also, when considering becoming sex buddies with a close friend, seriously think about how sex can change the friendship and is the friendship at that very moment worth risking?
HOWEVER, on the flip side (yes there is a flip side), there can be definitely be a positive side to becoming sex buddies with a close friend. For those that don't know me, I like to take life on a ride and I also think that complicating your friendship with sex can be one hell of a ride. You have the emotional connection with a friend on top of (hopefully) mind blowing, boot knocking, headboard banging, out of this world...sex. And to be honest, this can be the ride of a lifetime. For all you know, this person can be the one. I have always told myself that I want to fall in love with my friend. I feel like the man I will hopefully be with will start off as my best friend. And well sex has the power to take a friendship to a whole different level. But I do wonder, can one honestly have emotionless sex with a close friend? I mean strong feelings have already developed between close friends without sex...think of how it would be including sex. Another thing that I thought about is fear. My friend was on the fence about the decision and so when he was talking about the negative side of the situation, I asked him what was he afraid of. Often times we allow fear to cripple us in so many areas of life - professional, social, sexual, intellectual, emotional...and the list goes on. I asked him are you satisfied with the idea of this fear holding you back from saying yes? Is fear being a productive role in your decision making? Quite honestly, sometimes fear can be good. It will keep you in check and can potentially protect you from unknown dangers. However, fear can also deprive you of a lifelong happiness. If you are ever put in this situation, evaluate how valid (or invalid) your fear is in regards to the situation. So what is my verdict on the issue of friends with benefits? Well after the conversation that I had plus my own personality, I think I would personally take another risk and have a friend with benefits parter, when I'm ready for an emotional connection. Right now, no strings attached lol that's that good ole single life for ya! There were some other thoughts I had on this topic from the conversation that I can't recall now. Smh I should have blogged about this topic right when I first thought about doing so...shame on me. Anywho, leave your comments, questions, and concerns on this post. Hope this shines a brighter light on that situation and challenges you in thinking...or something lol newho ta ta for now! TOODLES! XOXO
Had a very interesting conversation with one of my close friends a couple of days ago. Basically one of his friends (which is a mutual friend) has proposed to him that they become fuck buddies. Now, I addressed this topic in an earlier post, but this conversation enlightened me on some things (and well I was actually out of this world when I was talking to him so I was thinking thoughts I probably normally wouldn't have thought about). The first thing I thought (since I know the both of them) was why was my friend asked this question. If a friend ever asks you to be sex buddies, listen. Out of all their friends in the world, they decided to ask you. Now, because this rose as a concern to me, I immediately thought about how complicated sex can make this friendship. Now I know that one of them can have sex without being emotionally attached, but the other person, not so much. I think feelings would develop from one person and the other not feel the same way, hence causing major tension in the friendship. And at this point, their friendship has grown a lot closer. Also, when considering becoming sex buddies with a close friend, seriously think about how sex can change the friendship and is the friendship at that very moment worth risking?
HOWEVER, on the flip side (yes there is a flip side), there can be definitely be a positive side to becoming sex buddies with a close friend. For those that don't know me, I like to take life on a ride and I also think that complicating your friendship with sex can be one hell of a ride. You have the emotional connection with a friend on top of (hopefully) mind blowing, boot knocking, headboard banging, out of this world...sex. And to be honest, this can be the ride of a lifetime. For all you know, this person can be the one. I have always told myself that I want to fall in love with my friend. I feel like the man I will hopefully be with will start off as my best friend. And well sex has the power to take a friendship to a whole different level. But I do wonder, can one honestly have emotionless sex with a close friend? I mean strong feelings have already developed between close friends without sex...think of how it would be including sex. Another thing that I thought about is fear. My friend was on the fence about the decision and so when he was talking about the negative side of the situation, I asked him what was he afraid of. Often times we allow fear to cripple us in so many areas of life - professional, social, sexual, intellectual, emotional...and the list goes on. I asked him are you satisfied with the idea of this fear holding you back from saying yes? Is fear being a productive role in your decision making? Quite honestly, sometimes fear can be good. It will keep you in check and can potentially protect you from unknown dangers. However, fear can also deprive you of a lifelong happiness. If you are ever put in this situation, evaluate how valid (or invalid) your fear is in regards to the situation. So what is my verdict on the issue of friends with benefits? Well after the conversation that I had plus my own personality, I think I would personally take another risk and have a friend with benefits parter, when I'm ready for an emotional connection. Right now, no strings attached lol that's that good ole single life for ya! There were some other thoughts I had on this topic from the conversation that I can't recall now. Smh I should have blogged about this topic right when I first thought about doing so...shame on me. Anywho, leave your comments, questions, and concerns on this post. Hope this shines a brighter light on that situation and challenges you in thinking...or something lol newho ta ta for now! TOODLES! XOXO
Monday, October 3, 2011
Real Vs Reality
So for the past couple of months (and for a couple more months), I have been taking advantage of the Netflix free month deal they have going on. Now I wanted Netflix because I wanted to be able to catch up on great shows that I never watched before since I'm not such a tv head. The first show that I said I would watch was Desperate Housewives. I know that I'm extremely late, but this show is absolutely GREAT! (My fav character is Bree...lowkey she's a goon and she gets mad respect from me lol) I have been depriving myself of this show all of this time!! I love this show for several reasons, but mainly because it makes me think. I love this show because to me honestly it might be one of the realest shows out on television. We often paint this picture of perfection of what life is and should be, but on Wisteria Lane, these perfect houses with perfect looking families all have secrets behind closed doors. And not just little secrets, huge, blown up, in your face, Jerry Springer and Maury type drama. To me the show challenges the perception of love, sacrifice, and morality. And I love the underlining hints of religion (not surprising huh). But anywho while I was watching this show, it made me think about what is real and reality.
To me, the concept of "real" or "realness" is nothing but societal standards. It is sometimes sad to see people strive for a social construct that can't and won't be obtainable. One always says that they want someone who is real, that keeps it 100, however, that concept can never be obtained. The reality of the matter is that there is no one who will keep it 100. The reality is people are human and always will be. When will we ever accept that? Even with the characters of Desperate Housewives, the bonds of their friendships are everlasting, but it was always tested. That's just how it is in life. The reality is that life is nowhere near perfect. Life is very complex and challenging and we always try to downplay the reality of this thing called life. Why is always so hard to accept the bad in life? We always try to cover it up with social colloquialisms that are by society's standards and not defined by our own standards. Imagine defining what life means to you and fully living it out, whether it is what is considered "moral" "right" "weird". Point is, we confined something so vast as life by allowing others to dictate to us who we should be and how we should live. The concept of real simply doesn't exist. The reality of the concept of real and realness are that it's unattainable. Life is challenging, embrace it and conquer it. That is all! Back to finishing off this episode of Desperate Housewives courtesy of good ole Netflix!
To me, the concept of "real" or "realness" is nothing but societal standards. It is sometimes sad to see people strive for a social construct that can't and won't be obtainable. One always says that they want someone who is real, that keeps it 100, however, that concept can never be obtained. The reality of the matter is that there is no one who will keep it 100. The reality is people are human and always will be. When will we ever accept that? Even with the characters of Desperate Housewives, the bonds of their friendships are everlasting, but it was always tested. That's just how it is in life. The reality is that life is nowhere near perfect. Life is very complex and challenging and we always try to downplay the reality of this thing called life. Why is always so hard to accept the bad in life? We always try to cover it up with social colloquialisms that are by society's standards and not defined by our own standards. Imagine defining what life means to you and fully living it out, whether it is what is considered "moral" "right" "weird". Point is, we confined something so vast as life by allowing others to dictate to us who we should be and how we should live. The concept of real simply doesn't exist. The reality of the concept of real and realness are that it's unattainable. Life is challenging, embrace it and conquer it. That is all! Back to finishing off this episode of Desperate Housewives courtesy of good ole Netflix!
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